it's life, Gin, but not as we know it.

This week is all about work and ill-health.

I'm huddled over a laptop in my piccalilli stained pyjamas with hair that would make Krusty the Clown jealous, perma-snarling at anyone who comes within a 5 metre radius. Without The Internets (that means you), by now I would have pulled my frazzled, tiny mind out of my left nostril.

This week The Internets have been lovely. These my favourites:

1. Letters of Note: letter from a 20 year old Madonna to a film-maker. I love Madonna, and have recently taken to trapping my child in the bath with her songs blaring. It's an important part of her education she feels the love and learns all the words to Holiday. It is not abuse. It should be on the curriculum.

This letter is pure Madonna magic:

'By the time I was in the fifth grade, I knew I either wanted to be a nun or a movie star. 9 months in a convent cured me of the first disease'.

And:

'I was born and raised in Detroit, Michigan where I began my career in petulance and precociousness.'

If you don't read Letters of Note (here) - which you obviously do, because who doesn't - do so immediately. Guaranteed brilliance.

2. Nobody can have missed the death of Jimmy Savile. Whatever you think of him - and I do concede that displaying his body at the Queen's Hotel in Leeds is more than a little ghoulish - he was a big part of my childhood.

And I'm from Leeds.

And as a teenager I worked for his bestmate as a gulag inmate of his, not so, chi-chi hair salon.

And he and I share a love of Scarborough.

(This is about as far as I can take our mutual similarities, before admitting to an early 1990s love of flamable tracksuit material, gangster gold and cuban cigars. Need I go on?)

It's in my blood, and no doubt in yours; I watched and wanted to be on Jim'll Fix It with weekly jealous fervour. Read Dom Lawson’s account of Jim fix-in it (here). It made me tearily nostalgic.

3. I've watched The Sound of Music for the seventy billionth time with my child.

For years I’ve baffled over other people’s love for the curtain wearing nun. Really? Come on, if you had to choose (I mean had to, like your life depended on it), it’s always the Baroness, right?

She has Christopher Plummer under her thumb, looks like a dream and has the good plan of sending the seven god-awful, do-re-mi kids to boarding school. I’d send them in a brown paper package, tied up with string, but that’s just me. I never know when to stop.

(Ok, she can’t catch a ball. But don’t you see, she’s better than that and she might crease her frock?)

4. My perfume this week is a heady combination of ashtray, frazzles and gin. Lucky for me Penhaligon’s has legitimised my slutness. Gin flavoured perfume (here). Need I say more.

5. When I’m feeling particularly low, I can always rely on Belgian Waffling’s more advanced time wasting internet skills to pull me through. This week a sage nod towards the Look at My Red Fucking Trousers blog made me lolz frazzles all over my screen. If you want to procrastinate, go here for a guaranteed mirth-fest.

6. And magnificant mumurations. Who knew what these were before this week? Well, apparently me. My husband says I was telling him about them last week. He's clearly confusing me with his Other Wife; the clean, organised, less hairy one he keeps for special in the shed. Anyway, click the embedded video below for Sophie Windsor Clive's mumurations and go here to see her video blogs.

Beautiful word, even more beautiful sight.

I declare this week won by the web.

Oh, and if that's wetted your appetite for more world wide web brilliance, shuffle over to Tara Cain's wonderful blog for a painstakingly and hysterically produced video of bloggers giving advice on what makes a great mother (here).

Here’s a preview of what me and the littlest Anderton think makes a good mum:

Some things never change. Whatever. Did you not see it’s been a bad week?

Read previous post: hear no evil, see no evil

Tags » List Slut Madonna The Gallery belgian waffle domestic sluttery jimmy savile letters of note mumurations my mummy says scarborough sound of music

2 November 2011
Views
2 Comments
Permalink
Tweet

it's life, Gin, but not as we know it.

Elsie's Space

Archive

About Elsie

Envy These

Lust List

Purchase Karma

Sloth Here

Follow Me